Stop the War on an American Tradition!


Oh, it started innocently enough. First there was the war on slavery. Then there was the war on drugs. Then there was the war on Santa, even questioning his racial status. And now comes the horror of horrors:


Matejko_Stańczyk“What?” you say. “Can’t one have a single day to practice innocent jokes against the pompous fools that surround us everyday?” But, NO! Now the dreadful thought police want to stamp out even your attempts to laugh at the foibles of others. Even John Oliver, a comedian(!), has turned against us.

But you can fight back. Dress in motley for the day. Better yet, dress your enemies in motley for the day. Keep a straight face as you discuss the metaphysical subtleties of Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off.” Ask when your firm will adopt a dress (or undress) code taken from “Game of Thrones.” Celebrate the coming of Easter by juggling raw eggs, preferably in front of someone whose clothing is in bad taste.

And in the words of the Constitution of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, let “sincerity, good humor, and all social affections, and generous sentiments among the people” prevail.



About Brian Bixby

I enjoy history because it helps me understand people. I'm writing fiction for much the same reason.
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4 Responses to Stop the War on an American Tradition!

  1. Judy says:

    Rats!! I should have read this yesterday. Maybe I wouldn’t have sat so meekly at my desk thinking I should come up with an outrageous one liner at the very least…then letting the great April the 1st go by unheralded instead!! Big Sigh!!

  2. crimsonprose says:

    For April Fool’s I did the first walk of the season – in the cold, wet, windy wilds. 12 miles. Who’s the fool?

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